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The infinite dilemma

  • what_the

I'm not doing the four spaces thingy so thank you for your interest you may leave this now for it will look like a mess nothing more.

Go to work or not, i can still play the sick part i still have two days sick leave left for me, but,that means they may pile up shit for me later, i'm to depressed to see anybody or socialize, agh, socialize why is it even important, your all kind and sweet but i'd so much rather be alone now instead of this lets-show-that-we-care conversation, yes, really, and about all this fake (how are you doing) question, is it the new hi, seriously? because i know i don't want to hear about your day and i don't want to talk about my day either.But then opsie co-workers, hello hello, how are you doing. I'm fine. lol that's a joke, ever read about that it's only initials for Frustrated, .Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional,it seems like an emo kid made this , but yes to tell the truth to your question , i'm fine and not fine, happiness isn't an easy thing that i can acquire and i'd rather so much i'm not around so many people and so much noise, i wish i can go to bed for 3 days of uninterrupted sleep and 3 extra days of doing absolutely nothing but thinking about how to end this, and seems like i should worry or i should not , because i know i am both of this fine and not fine, so that sums it to i shouldn't be worried about being this empty.

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التعليقات

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iouser234 أضف ردا 
there there, take it easy
what you need is a good cup of tea and some anime, jPOP, or an MMO to relax and play.
you do sound like an EMO kid btw, but hell, who doesn't, shit is dark these days and we all going to get fucked
keep yourself motivated by thinking; one day, just one day, you may give them the middle finger from up-top and say:
i did it you stupid fucks, am releasing my book, go fuck yourself's
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what_the أضف ردا

Horizontal scroll!

I have to agree on that much needed cup of tea, and anime but i have no time for watching anime, you'd be amazed at the amount of tasks i have to do, on daily basis. It has to do with work &&kids&&being a single mum did i mention that i raise my kids on my own? Every goddamn thing is doubled but it's more 'tolerable' this way. I'm not emo i'm just pissed off and exhausted. And yes i ended up not going to work cuz i'm sick and i don't feel like going anyways.I really don't know if I'm actually a totally healthy person. Really, everybody else seems so but i'm always the one taking everything to the next level, it's just the way i am, and it doesn't seem to improve, the thing is i think sometimes i have relapsed into major depression but then i wonder if i was at that state i wouldn't have goals in my life because i do, i still dream about my unwritten book, or my art gallery, but on the other hand my appetite for life isn't great, also, i'm not a person with low self esteem because that's the case in all depressed people, i am aware of what i can and cannot do.May be i am a person with a very bad up and down mood swings? do i make sense...ah beside i am no emo kid Hade, unless you meant emotional then that would apply.

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iouser234 أضف ردا

Just let it be... your life i mean... once you get to the point where you just simply dont give a fuck you get better.

Being a single mom is a hard thing, plus having to work, and home daily tasks, i kniw someone who got literally crazy because of this... just take it easy and keep the "who gives a fuck" atitude and you'll be fine

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what_the أضف ردا

I do have that who gives a fuck attitude it works wonders , that's not the case. I am my worst obstacle. Until i put my mood swings into the right path i will keep going insane and snapping to the slightest events.